“they say a good attitude is half of the battle.” he had spent most of his time making sure he avoided the winchesters, though his vessel’s name was in the public eye. the kid still had no idea that it had been his best friend that killed his girl anyway, so he truly did not have a target on his back himself. He didn’t doubt that someone would blab so he continued to take precautions anyway. “He certainly has a temper regarding people he cares about. Not nearly as much as his brother from what I’ve heard.”
“i still don’t want to deal with him.” deep down, ky knew that it would happen one day, and that he’d end up facing sam. more importantly, it would be a fight, and one that ky would win. a reason to why he wanted to avoid it. that way… maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t be forced to kill sam. “it would hurt her and i don’t want to put her through that.”
“not directly, of course. but there’s some sort of fate out there – and it is hard to understand it.” everyone had their time, but she found it hard to look at anyone’s time being so short. jessica’s hit closest to home because she was her daughter, but she had patients die young and kept up with the news. heaven may be a better place, but living out a life surrounded by people you cared about first would always be optimal.
“find her way? all she had to do was come home – we would be able to help her with whatever – there’s no moving on when you lose a child. not really. you try to, but their loss will always be there.”
he was about to spit out some half-assed comment about how he didn’t care. more importantly, ky was almost about to go into a lecture about how she didn’t know what she was talking about. it would have been all so easy in his mind, but instead he opted for a much easier response. one, that he knew he’d come to regret in the near future if things didn’t do perfectly.
“there’s no moving on when you lose anyone,” he said, sucking in a deep breath, and letting it out slowly. “the best thing you can do is just ignore it.” a pause. “i tried looking into my past – did so for years, but i found nothing. just more questions and no answers.”
had she known about demons then she would have been a terrible choice to set forth azazel’s plan with. luckily, sam was running away from his past so desperately that he would never have mentioned anything about it to her. even when dean came and whisked him away, putting the plan ahead of schedule. "they get their emotions so tied up in everything. it was nothing personal, sam just happened to fall hard for her pretty fast.” he knew she would never trust him – and probably would have a hard time trusting the actual tyson brady, but he was long dead. “speaking of, does he know she’s alive and you have her doing your bidding?”
“if he knew either of those things… there’s no doubt in my mind that i’d have a target on my back.” then again, ky didn’t care. he could handle one lone hunter – he had before, but he doubted this would be as…easy to talk his way out of. living among humans for so long taught him many things, but sometimes… he had to resort to more drastic measures. if push came to shove? he’d always pull out a more… selfish card, but until that date… jess would be fine. he didn’t need to worry her with anything unnecessary. not yet at least. “or worse. either way? i’ll be fine.”
“lookin for a night out on the town? off a few worthless shitstains?”
“well, how could i ever say no to that?” a slight grin pulled at his lips for a few moments. “a night on the town and just a few? i was thinking of a massacre of sorts.”
“i am rather entertaining.”
“well, i do believe we’ll have to put that a test – won’t we?”
“it’s been hard… trying to understand why God would take her from us so soon.” for a while, clarissa had struggled with her faith. jessica had always lead a full life, but she had barely begun when she passed. everyone in their family had dealt with the loss in different ways, but thoughts about jess never failed to bring tears to her eyes.
“maybe i selfishly do still wish that she was around, though she would be more at peace up in Heaven.” if jessica was alive, there was something mysterious about her – and she didn’t doubt that it had something to do with her boyfriend. between her daughter and her husband, clarissa was stuck in the middle – on the fence about what she thought about him.
“i doubt it was some absentee father figure,” he said bluntly, not even bothering to clip his words. even before his situation, he never believed in god – nor did he think the bastard existed. of course, he knew there was a guy who was god, but he was a disaster. still, this wasn’t the time – nor the place – to speak of such things entirely. a reason to why he attempted to change the subject off of something that could quite possibly be so… heated. “if she’s alive,” he said, “she might be trying to find her away again. if she’s not? well, there is nothing let to do, but move on. you might not like it – hell, you might even hate it, but…sometimes it’s needed.”
❝ — and to what do i owe the pleasure of such an unwanted visitor? ❞
“ i’m here to see your boss.” of course, that was just one of the few reasons he was here, but still an important one all the same. “otherwise… i’d be as far away from here as possible.”
❝ there is nothing i hate more than a liar, which makes it bloody exhausting when people refuse to believe me. ❞
“well, lying is part of the job,” he said, arms crossing over his chest. “though, what is a lie anyways? the truth can be harsher than any lie.” depending on what was said. then again, ky didn’t care ( at least on most days ). “trust me on that.”
❝ this is the kin of shit i was hoping to avoid. i’ve got nothing to do but try to live out these new days i’ve been given for unknown reasons. and i was hoping that avoiding the question of why meant avoiding all of the knowledge that i had gained while trapped inside my own body. ❞
part of him wished he could relate, but quite frankly? he couldn’t – not even when his father took over his body – it just wasn’t something he could do. not really at least. “yes, well, that happens.” it wasn’t the best thing to say, but in reality? he didn’t really care – not really at any-rate. “you just learn to get over yourself.”
❝ your little playtoy still avoiding you? guess you really shouldn’t have taught her ways to evade you. – you could always hire some non-demonic oafs to bust her out of the warded motel room. ❞
“that little toy of mine is going through a small crisis,” he said, hands slipping into the pockets of his jeans. “i taught her just enough to keep her safe. if she decides to keep this up for longer than a few days? well, there is more than one way to get her out – i don’t even need to hire anyone. i’d just burn her out.”
Hellfirebound 